Please help me reach my dream (Middletown, OH)

Please help me reach my dream

This might be a bit long. I have struggled with severe depression since I was 14 I m considered a high functioning depressive. I have let this take over my life and I have let it dictate my life and I have fallen into those negative self fulfilling prophecies numerous times over and over again. This past summer I tried to commit suicide because I just saw no hope or point in living anymore.I have finally realized that I deserve better from myself. It s not going to be easy to change the way I think but it has already begun and I couldn t be more proud of myself. My internal self worth is growing and finally on the right track. Because I deserve to be happy inside and out. I deserve to be my best. I deserve to have only people who want the best for me in my life. I m also taking on another hard part of my life my weight. It s going to be hard and bumpy but that s okay. My weight might seem hopeless at times but its not an excuse not to like myself anymore. It is going to be changed so that once I come to fully love myself it will be my mind and my body that I love. I want to go to The Biggest Loser resort in New York for three weeks by February. I know that sitting at home with my own mind is just going to be a downfall because I am so extremely out of shape. The depression just sits there taking over with thoughts of I ll never be able to change or do it because I am so far gone. I chose the Biggest Loser resort because its 6 hours of exercise every single day. There is no getting out of it there is no putting it off because hopefully I will feel mentally better tomorrow. I also chose this because it is away from my house while I am trying to make this a habit and the biggest change of my life. My family tends to judge quite harshly baised on the past. You couldn t do it before why are you even wasting money buying the healthy stuff again You re never going to change is just an example of things that will get thrown my way. So this would be an amazing opportunity to do what I need to do away from negative influences and to be able to focus on finding myself. My current weight is 210 lbs. The profile picture is when I was 165 but that only lasted a few weeks before everything went to hell again. I have never been able to reach my healthy bmi weight of 130. My current BMI is 38.7 which is obese. And I do feel it everyday I have to use an inhaler just because my lungs can t handle me laughing with friends. This might be weird to ask of people but I need the financial help. Two weeks before Christmas my company layed me off so there is no way I can afford this on my own. Any money donated will be used only for this trip. If this trip does not happen all money will be returned that was donated. I m not here to scam anyone I m honestly just looking for some help. Thank you to anyone who is willing to help me. this isnt spam its just my gofundme page. www.gofundme.com biggestloserhelp